Why?

I’ve been thinking lately about accomplishments. I have all these things in my life that I would like to accomplish, but for one reason or another, I never do. Whether it’s because I forget, I’m too lazy, or just can’t seem to get motivated, the end result is the same. Nothing changes.

For example, I feel like I need to lose about 10-15 lbs. The thing is that I haven’t altered my diet or exercise habits in any way, yet I’m still disappointed when nothing changes. It’s completely illogical. And I don’t know how to fix it.

I know it’s mostly a mental thing – I have some kind of block or something that seems to be holding me back. I realize that this sounds like a lame excuse, but mentality is incredibly important when it comes to trying to adjust behaviors.

So, the question remains: how do I overcome my own mentality and convince myself to start creating positive changes in my life?

I have no idea. That’s the problem. There are hundreds, if not thousands of books, blogs, podcasts, and vlogs that aim to educate us on how to ‘become more productive’ or ‘overcome mental hurdles’ or ‘find more time in the day’ but each one seems to fall short for me.

Why?

Clearly the answer is me. I’m unable (or unwilling) to take the advice given and use it to my own advantage. I am holding myself back. I am standing in my own way. I am the hurdle I need to overcome.

That is some terribly depressing information to realize about myself. Which makes me even less willing or able to convince myself to be more proactive with adopting changes.

It’s a never-ending loop of self-destruction. I don’t try because I’m getting in my way and I’m getting in my way because I don’t try. A total catch-22. I’m stuck in a roundabout and can’t seem to find the exit sign or off ramp.

What to do?

For starters, admitting that I have a problem is a pretty good first step. But, it’s only useful if I manage to move past this first step and onto another. I need to find my ‘why.’ My ultimate reason that what I want to change is worthwhile. That elusive motive that gives me enough purpose to actually follow through on something, anything.

Better health isn’t a good enough reason, apparently. Nor is fitting into a smaller dress size. It makes me wonder how other people manage to find their raison d’être.

Does it come in a flash of insight, an epiphany that hits them like a stack of bricks? Is it more like a slow realization that unfolds over time? Either way, mine has been evading me for a long time and doesn’t show signs of being found any time soon.

Perhaps it’s all for the best. After all, without this internal struggle going on, I might not have had anything to write about today. I just hope that I find my ‘why’ eventually. Sooner rather than later would be nice.

I hope everyone has an enlightening weekend!

I Love Lists

When it comes to creating lists, I’m a pro. I can whip up a list for cleaning, shopping, even budgeting in no time flat. My problem comes with the follow through. Specifically, when it comes to sticking to a rigid cleaning schedule.

I have tried the clean-everything-at-once method and the clean-a-little-bit-everyday method, in various forms. Neither has worked particularly well for me. Of course, each time, I was using someone else’s pre-made list. Working on their timeline and with their priorities.

This time, I have done a lot of reading and web searching and come up with my own version. I made the master list, then broke it up into manageable chunks with like items bundled together. Finally, I created the timeline based on my own priorities and abilities.

It’s still new and I haven’t gotten into the full swing of things yet, but I’m quite hopeful. I’ve managed to do most of the items on my list without feeling overwhelmed or guilty for not doing it all perfectly. I see that as progress. And any progress is good.

In the spirit of accomplishment, I hope everyone has a successful weekend!

Binge-fest

When Game of Thrones first came out, back in 2011, I tried watching it, but it was never much of a priority. I had much more important shows to watch, like Supernatural and True Blood.

My husband recently started watching Game of Thrones and I found myself getting drawn in. This culminated in us binge-watching the seventh season in its entirety yesterday.

It was awesome!

I am now quite impatient for the eighth, and final, season to begin in three weeks. I can’t believe I waited this long to watch such an impressive show. Better late than never.

Hope everyone has a fantastic day!

Beverage Update

Back in January, I wrote about changing my drinking habits. I was attempting to switch from mostly sugary beverages to mostly water-type beverages with little to no sugar.

I am happy to announce that it has been a huge success. I haven’t had an actual soda in well over a month. Instead, I drink mostly naturally flavored carbonated water, along with some coffee, tea, and, of course, plain water.

It has been immensely liberating to not rely so heavily on overly processed drinks. In fact, I have even started drinking plain seltzer water, in the form of Perrier, and it is delicious. I never liked the taste of plain carbonated water before; I thought it was disgusting.

How my taste buds have changed! And in such a short time too. I am very happy with my progress and am researching dietary changes, which will be my next healthy project.

May you all enjoy your health and happiness to its fullest extent!

Shifting Beverages

The biggest problem with trying to make changes is doing too much all at once. This is especially true at the new year. I’ve fallen into this trap many times myself. So, I decided to do things a bit different this year.

I’m making changes slowly and one at a time. I know, super radical, but it seems to be working.

I started tracking my caloric intake and realized that a lot of my calories were coming from what I drank. Needless to say, I figured that would be a good place to start adjusting my habits. My drinks went from a lot of sugary, calorie laden soda, juice, and sweet tea to mostly water in various forms.

I never used to like sparkling water that didn’t have a lot of added sugar. Of course, I never really gave it a chance either. That changed recently and I have a new appreciation for unsweetened drinks. In fact, I find them quite refreshing.

I’m hoping I can snowball this one change into more in the near future. I look forward to sharing my wellness journey with you each week.

Stay happy!

Oops.

So, I totally forgot to post yesterday. The weather has been a little crazy here lately. It keeps going back and forth – from cold and snowy, to warm and rainy. It’s quite annoying.

Hopefully, I stay on top of things a bit better next week.

Stay safe and warm everyone.

First Post of 2019

The year has gotten off to a great start. I’m feeling hopeful and renewed. I already made a big change.

My hair went from blonde

to a dark auburn brown.

I’m quite happy with the results.

I also started writing poetry again. I haven’t felt inspired in a while, but that has changed. It all makes me feel alive and reborn. I hope that everyone else feels as revitalized as I do right now.

All the best for this wonderful new year!

Last Post of the Year

It has been one crazy year. From three failed IVF cycles to losing my source of income to getting a new job, it has been a rollercoaster of emotions. I saw a motivational poster recently that really struck home. It was of a Chinese proverb that said: Be not afraid of going slowly; be afraid only of standing still.

That is one philosophy I intend to take with me into the new year. Progress, however minute, is still progress and I need to remember that. Even if I am only inching forward towards my goals, I am still moving. It’s something I tend to forget, a lot.

My goals aren’t huge as of now. They are pretty basic: Drink more water and less soda, stop cussing, and start exercising again. I know I can attain each of them, so long as I remember that it’s not going to happen overnight.

I believe we can all reach the goals we set for ourselves, no matter how big or small. All we need is the motivation and support to get there. As a last token of whimsy for this year, here is a picture of my two Narwhal mugs to make you smile.

Happy New Year, everyone!!

Schedule Change

The holiday season is upon us, as is the cold & flu season. With that in mind, I am going to be changing my blog post schedule.

Until now, I have been posting twice a week, on Wednesday’s and Saturday’s. With my currently hectic schedule and being sidelined by sickness, I will be posting only on Saturday’s for the foreseeable future.

I hope that everyone has a lovely, healthy, stress-free winter.

Happy Halloween!

It’s the most wonderful day of the year!

No offense to the other holidays, but Halloween is just the best. Costumes and candy and magic in the air. A time for anyone to be anyone or anything they want. It’s a beautiful thing.

Now, I feel like it’s really autumn. The weather is getting colder, the leaves are changing colors, and children are running around dressed like witches and goblins.

Halloween is just wonderful!